Little acts of kindness

More stories from my clinical update experience (see previous post) ...

I have told you that, as an observer, I did not have any patient responsibilities, so was free to do anything I wanted to enrich my learning. I was able to go around the ward and observe ongoing procedures. I could also fill up patients’ cups with warm, boiled water. Older Chinese men and women do not like cold drinks, and we always drink boiled water. I could fetch a patient a bedpan or urinal if they needed one, or pass a request to the nurse in charge of their care.

During visiting hours, I also had time to talk to them and their families or friends. I was impressed by the families’ devotion to the patients and told them I appreciated how much they cared. I have had family members admitted into hospital, and I know what it is like to have to visit a close relative in hospital on a daily basis.

Anyway, that was all I did—just little things, really unremarkable, but even within the short period of time that I spent on the unit, these patients (as an observer, I can’t call them my patients) repeatedly complimented me on how kind and good I was. It was truly embarrassing when they loudly told me I was the best. I could only tell them that it seemed so because I was the only one who had all the time in the world there, without any particular responsibilities. I told them other nurses would act just the same in my position. I didn’t deserve those compliments.

To me, this clearly demonstrates that people do not expect us nurses to solve all of their problems. Nurses are ever so cautious when patients and their relatives ask how they, the patients, are doing. Surely we can do better than just saying, “This is a question for the doctor,” or “I will let the doctor know you are concerned.”

We don’t need to solve all of their problems. They know we can’t. They just want an acknowledgment of their pain and burden. They need a moment to vent and a pat on the shoulder to give them the extra bit of energy they need to go on.

For Reflections on Nursing Leadership (RNL), published by the Honor Society of Nursing, Sigma Theta Tau International.