Ageless attire

Do you know of any attire that is truly ageless, or age-neutral?

You’re right. Jeans. There is another one. … That would be the backpack.

I love jeans and backpacks. These items are a regular part of my outfit. They are suitable for kids, teens, adults and seniors—not exclusive to any particular age group. Of course, the occasion is important. You can’t wear jeans to a black tie event.

They are gender-neutral, good for people of all shapes and sizes. Jeans have been marketed as a sexy commodity. Sexy or not, they are practical, and you don’t need to think or feel that you are sexy in order to put on a pair.

They are just great inventions. I wish there were more goods, ideas—whatever—that would transcend the age boundary. I hope that, in the world we live in, a time will come when age really doesn’t matter that much. That would be a world radically different from the one we know now.

For Reflections on Nursing Leadership (RNL), published by the Honor Society of Nursing, Sigma Theta Tau International.

Maintaining personal space: A new rule

I was doing my weeklong clinical update in a major regional hospital. The cafeteria was always packed during lunch breaks. I tried to have lunch after the rush hour, to avoid the congestion but, still, the café was fairly busy. There I learnt a new rule about interpersonal boundaries.

In general, people (mostly urban population) maintain an invisible personal space around them, which they expect others to stay out of. The distance that people keep from one another depends upon the relationship they have with the other person in an interaction, or the context of its occurrence. When we are in crowds, this personal space shrinks, and when we are in a more spacious environment, our alarm bells ring if someone who has no particular reason to do so gets too close to us.

Applying this rule in the hospital café (where everybody shares tables as in a Hong Kong fast-food restaurant), I would expect that, at a table for four, when only one seat is taken by me, the next person would come and sit diagonally opposite from where I am (Fig. 1), thus maximizing personal space.

To my surprise, someone came to sit right beside me, leaving the two seats on the opposite side of the table empty (Fig 2). Initially, I thought this was entirely random, but it happened to me more than once, so it had to mean something, and that got me thinking.

Interpersonal rules that I have learnt in the past dictate that, when I sit down diagonally opposite someone, I should ask whether the seat is taken. Even if, because of intense competition for space during lunch, I do not ask, I should look the person in the eye, nod and/or smile. By sitting right next to me, however, the person does not need to look at me or acknowledge my existence.

I find this both interesting and alarming. Have we become that alienated from one another?

For Reflections on Nursing Leadership (RNL), published by the Honor Society of Nursing, Sigma Theta Tau International.